A STEP BY STEP GUIDE TO

Step 1     BUY A GUITAR*

*or steal one depending on your initiative

Step 2     BUY A TUNER

Visit your local music emporium and ask the man behind the counter for a tuner. If he hands you a fish you have most likely walked into a fishmongers by mistake. Locate your instrument seller and repeat the above question.

Step 3     BUY A LEAD

So that you can use your newly aquired tuner you must purchase a lead to connect it to your guitar!!
Walk into your guitar suppiers and ask the assistant for a lead.
If at this point he hands a you a length of leather, check that you haven’t entered your local pet shop by mistake....as we all know “Pet Shop Boys” know F**k All about guitars!!
After triumphantly clutching your brand new lead, return home for your musical journey is about to begin.............

More coming SOON!

1. "AX"L ROSE
2. "TIM BUR"GESS
3. "LUMBER JACK" CHARLTON
4. JEREMY  P"AX"MAN
5. RON "CHOPPER" HARRIS